Silly Silly people.

I'm not one hundred percent sure that I really remember how this week went and that's not because I wasn't present just maybe because it was a short week... On Monday we worked on our hand drawings and I found that I quite enjoyed them which is pretty good because I haven't really found anything in particular that I've enjoyed drawing in this class. In a way I think that is sad to say because I'm supposed to be a Studio art major and here I am struggling with what should be the most simple concept to grasp... maybe it's the human figure that stresses me out but I also think that it might have something to do with how I have knowledge of the time restraint, and I'm the type of person who can get really stressed out in timed situations. At the same time that I say that I also think about how I could just be making up excuses for myself; I don't have to be good at everything if I'm a Studio Art major... My concentration isn't life drawing anyways. Okay, so getting back to business, on Wednesday we drew skulls and I am finding those to be one, if not the most complicated things that we have worked on and I think that it has a lot to do with the proportions and putting all of the individual pieces together. So now that we are finally boiling down to the end of the semester I have realized how just about everything has crept up really fast and I'm gonna be spending most of these last few weeks in the library, picking up where I should've left off.

asdfghjkl.

Report · 9:43pm

haha, i'm excited for it

but my parents wont like it

Report · 9:43pm

yeah well

...that's how it is

Report · 9:44pm

haha yeah, i told my mom last fall i was thinking about getting a tattoo and she didn't even look at me and she teared up a little bit and said i should do that to my body

so i'm a little nervous

Report · 9:45pm

*should do that

?

i think you mean *shouldn't

Report · 9:45pm

haha yes.

good catch

Report · 9:46pm

yeah but how long can we feel guilty for what our parents do and don't believe

Report · 9:47pm

well said

Report · 9:48pm

Lars and I have been talking about that lately

Report · 9:48pm

haha, bad influence?

ha

Report · 9:48pm

no

ha

we have been talking about it

he hasn't been preaching about it

Report · 9:49pm

oh ha ok

Report · 9:51pm

we talked about family and how the bonds between blood take too much of a precedent over how we make our decisions and live our lives

Report · 9:51pm

i've never thought about that

but that makes complete sense to me

Report · 9:53pm

he thinks that we follow this dynamic because that's how it's been for centuries but in all actuality we owe our families nothing because we were born into these bonds

Report · 9:54pm

hmmm, idk if i agree with owing our families nothing

but i get what he's sayin

Report · 9:54pm

mmmm

it's all relative

Report · 9:55pm

right

Report · 9:55pm

I think that we owe our families something

but not our free will

Report · 9:55pm

yeah

i agree with that

Report · 9:56pm

If we owed our families that than everyone would always be a product of how they were raised

Report · 9:56pm

definitely

i hear THAT

Report · 9:57pm

well, so where does it end?

Report · 9:57pm

megan you know i don't know the answer to that

Report · 9:57pm

neither do I

that's the beauty of it

Report · 9:58pm

haha

i se

see*

Report · 10:00pm

the beauty is in the discovery of the question and the knowledge that no matter how many times you repeatedly answer it there are always more questions and more explorations to make

Report · 10:01pm

and how questions like that kind of just make you sit down and go blank

Report · 10:03pm

not actually blank but like only think about that question trying to come up with an answer

Report · 10:05pm

yes sir

I'm an addict

Report · 10:07pm

intervention?

Report · 10:07pm

ahhhh nothing can stop it

and I would never ask for such a blissful existence

Finding a mind is easier than finding a brain.

This last week was pretty weird and that is one of the reasons why this post is so darn late. I'm sorry to all of you that had to do two comments when I didn't have my post up. So just to start off I want to take a look at my drawing/picture because this is what I believe to be one out of only two drawings that I produced last week. I like drawing the hands because I don't get so stressed out about the proportions and how they move etc. This picture however could have been a great deal better because the lines are really thick when they shouldn't be and the contour lines really don't add up as well as they should but I am working on both of those things. This week we worked on our manikins and on hand drawings, and I think that thus far working on hands is a lot more enjoyable for me. Not only because I am fascinated with hands but also because of the way that we have been able to work and how we can do the manikin hands or the model's hand or the clay. It's a bummer though that I feel as if I'm starting to improve and now we are really getting down to the last couple weeks of class. I'm so nervous to be out of school because I really do think that I'm going to lose a lot of the hard earned progress and that scares me. I suppose that we will see whether or not that is true when we all show up next year. I wish I could be in school all year round but unfortunately I don't have enough money to do so. I hope that all of you have been having a wonderful week and that I see you all in class on Wednesday before we get a little bit of a break.

Nightmares of a wasted existence.

This week has been somewhat interesting and not necessarily in a bad way which seems to be unique if you look at the last couple weeks and see how I've been doing. We only had two days of class this week and though it was nice to get a little bit of a break I still wish that I could have drawn Friday because I'm starting to feel like I'm improving. I apologize for not having pictures up throughout the last couple weeks but I just picked up a new computer yesterday and now I can actually upload images which is simply spectacular. So this whole week we have been drawing, we had a couple muscle assignments which the first one seemed to go really well but I haven't gotten to the second one quite yet... Monday we did quicker long poses which turned out really bad for me but I'm glad that I ended the week on a better note with the hour long pose. I have a great difficulty finding a good way to execute what I'm seeing in front of me and as we all know that can become problematic. For the muscle assignments this week I feel as if they have gone relatively quickly and that I like but today I'm just sitting outside and soaking up the warm air because I'm sick as a dog and so finding motivation to go down to the art building and build muscles onto my manikin is well... pretty much impossible. It's strange watching all of the hustle and bustle as compared to the winter months of people deciding to use their homes as a barricade between them and the outside world. So, I used this picture because I feel as if it best represented where I'm at in the class. Believe it or not, I am improving. The angle that I was at compared to the model was difficult in this situation and trying to find the angle of her head was really hard too but I think that in the end it worked out just fine and now I hope to improve in other areas. As for the title of my blog, it references a dream that I had one night earlier this week about a girl that I'm nannying this summer and last summer as well. The dream consisted of her yelling and carrying on to me about how she wasn't going to do what I wanted her to and unfortunately that's exactly how she is. But, I feel like it references more than just the summer. It brought into account everything that we do in order to earn money and in order to get by in school and in everyday life. I always tell my Mom that I'd rather live poor and do what I love than be rich and work at a desk for ten hours a day... but now I'm trying to see if that's the truth at all because I'm taking a job again this summer that I'm going to be absolutely miserable doing but if I don't take it I can't come back to school next year. Makes me wonder really if it's foreshadowing.

Whenever you need me.

Life is infinitely strange and I think that we all might agree on that but unfortunately there is no predicting what is going to happen next and it is a beautiful but often frightening thing. Lately I have been confronted with people who are in the same boat as me, first I picked up one of best friends and the party seems to keep growing until now it's relatively the size of a cruise ship. Now, these things that we are dealing with are anything but fun and they are put in our lives in order to teach us lessons, in order to help us grow, within ourselves and in our relationships with others. It's often hard to take a step back from difficult circumstances and praise God for putting them there but sometimes the only thing that you can do is step back. In the midst of the world's despair there is still peace, there is still hope with every sunrise and very few people stop in the middle of their lives hustle and bustle in order to realize this truth. Anyways, so that was a random lead in that doesn't really lead you in to my life drawing overview. This week in life drawing we worked on developing the body as a whole and getting everything into our 30 second gesture drawings, and man o man was that tough stuff. Okay, so I know that we have been doing it for awhile now and I've been really working at it but I just cant seem to get it. (ps. I will get pictures of my drawings up as soon as I can get my darn computer fixed) Okay... in the middle of the week we did long poses where Annie posed with her arms up so that we could practice the curves of the armpit and see how the shoulder muscles came together. I thought that this practice was really fun and I actually thought that I was doing quite well until I took a look at everyone else's drawings. I'm beginning to feel kind of like a broken record for saying that and recognizing the fact that I really need to start improving. Though I did make a change this week and went from lead charcoal to graphite and from standing to sitting down, I found that drawing is a lot more painful for your shoulders when you're sitting down. I did like the change to pencils though because I think that it helped quite a bit with the line weight and the sketching of the figure. At the end of the week class got canceled which was a blessing in disguise because I was able to finish applying my muscles and got to go home early to my dog who was thrilled. Also, I found that these muscles were difficult because I wasn't sure exactly how they connected under the shoulder and the books are often hard to follow. I hope that you all had absolutely wonderful weeks and weekends and I will see you bright and early.

Movement On Dreams. Stand Under None.

Mod Sun: Jeremy Cooper Photography

This week seemed to go by pretty fast which is strange because I feel like this week was filled with a whole lot of hustle and bustle. I've been working pretty diligently on a project for my sculpture class that I will hopefully be finishing up soon, and by soon I mean that hopefully I will have it finished by Monday. I'm surprised that Lars hasn't killed me yet because I really test his patience with due dates and the mess of the ideation process... Life is infinitely strange. I believe that I'm going to be concentrating in sculpture, and I hope that I've got that all figured out now... It's funny how one minute we will be entirely convinced that we are doing everything that we want to do in life and then the next minute it changes. Now off to another grand topic. This week in life drawing we have been working on the muscles that make up the shoulder as well as a few on the back, and I have found this quite difficult because I feel that no matter how many times they get explained to me I still find myself standing at my easel without the slightest clue as to what to do. I've been trying to improve my drawings based off of how I drew last year and I don't really think that it's going too well because I'm still outlining just as much as I did back then. Bob gave me trouble for that all of last year and I thought that I finally was improving but apparently that was all in my head because Amy mentioned to me that that is an area that needs a great deal of improvement. Have any of you guys ever seen something from a certain viewpoint and no matter what you do there is no changing that and then all of a sudden something hits you out of nowhere and you realize that things aren't just black and white. Sometimes there is a mix of gray... Unfortunately my camera and my outlets on the side of my computer are broken so I can't get any pictures for you at this time

One step forward and eight steps back.

This week has been a great deal more interesting than I hoped that it would be which has caused me to be really extremely off of my game.... Which has a great deal to do with why I'm doing this blog so much later than the rest of you. Unfortunately when I thought about this week and about having a break, it didn't occur to me that I would have to do a blog. Anyways, so this last week all of us had a great deal of things to do because of the midterms and so on but if you pile up a crashed computer it gets a bit more nerve-racking. After getting my hard drive completely wiped out I got my computer back and it is still quite a bit broken, none of the drives work and to top it all of my external hard drive crashed the day after my computer did. Two years of schoolwork and 18 days of music down the drain... Sometimes life throws curve-balls and unfortunately I'm not the most coordinated person in the world. So here I am having yet to realize the significance of all of the information I have lost, possibly afraid of coming to that realization... a little bit of both. Spring break was good to me, it did exactly what it was supposed to do, gave rest to an overworked brain at the perfect time. But since this post is a little all over the place I think that I'm going to start over without starting over: This last week during drawing we worked on the feet and my goodness were they/are they hard. So I was standing there in class drawing foot by foot and thinking that I'm doing so well when I look over at everyone else and their drawings are beautiful in every way. So after Friday's class I came home and asked members of my family to pose their feet, thank goodness I don't do this on days with the whole body haha... anyways, I found that I improved but I feel as if I was drawing the feet wrong and I just hope that I will someday get the process down. Looking forward into the rest of the semester I hope to begin improving at a lot more than I have been but that is going to take more effort than I have been giving, and I'm not sure I have that much time but I will continue to try. Unfortunately I can't post any pictures this week because my computer drives aren't working.... but hey, hopefully I will get one up soon. [Okay, so I got a picture up even though it doesn't exactly fit in with this blog... this is my studio space in the sculpture lab, though it is now painted over. It influenced a project that I am working on now which I hope goes well]